If you’re wondering why you feel like you’re at the lowest point of your life whilst still being in your mid-twenties, it’s most likely caused by a term called a quarter-life crisis. That’s right, it exists and it is very real. You might have heard of it’s older relative, mid-life crisis, which is often a reason to why adults in their forties are suddenly into partying again. But for the quarter-life crisis, it’s a completely different meaning.
What is a quarter-life crisis?
Quarter-life crisis is a term developed in many popular psychology studies. It is described as a phase in your life when you’re still a young adult, usually your twenties to thirties, where you experience an intense amount of stress and burden. It messes everything you have planned for your future because you feel like you’ve hit rock bottom, but you’re not bouncing back up. It usually comes when we graduate from high school or university and starts living the ‘real world’, which isn’t a walk in the park as we’ve assumed.
How do I know I have it?
There are quite a lot of symptoms that can signify a quarter-life crisis. The most prevalent one is depression. Depression is described as losing the purpose in anything we do daily. We have no motivation to get out of bed, no motivation to work, no motivation to better ourself. It feels like everything is a waste of time. It feels like nothing is falling into place, and you’d rather shut yourself out of everything.
The next ones are frustrated from not achieving enough when you thought you would have (by now), losing confidence, extreme fear of failure and commitment. You’ll likely question whether or not you took the right major in university if you did, why is my work boring me? You’ll question if you’ve chosen the right partner, who seemingly has everything if you did, why do I feel so trapped? And if you’re reckless, you’d quit your job and quit your relationship altogether. And then, you’ll be lonely and depressed, all over again. This is how you know that you have a quarter-life crisis.
How do I deal with it?
The first thing you need to do is understand that most Millenials experience quarter-life crisis, meaning, it’s the new normal. You’re not the only one who feels that way, and chances are, you can support others who are experiencing it. And they can support you. The next one is exactly that, it is to find the right people to support you. People who are good listeners, and great at giving advice. People who make you feel comfortable and doesn’t add pressure.
You should also know that when you’ve overcome this, you are emotionally stronger for other road bumps in your life. That should be your motivation to keep going. And the last option is to set realistic goals. Often, we experience quarter-life crisis because we set a very ambitious goal when we were younger, such as, “when I’m 27 I should have my own car!”. Yet here you are, in a packed subway train, on your way back home. You should set a more reachable goal, such as, “when I’m 27, I’m going to open up a home savings account!”